August 10, 2006

  • going to make this REALLY as short as possible...


    i'm watching goog again full-time... for you new readers or people who have no clue... goog is gabrielle, my best friend mary kay's daughter. i babysit her a lot but now more than ever because she's out of school for a while.  so i'm basically coming in around 8:30... getting her fed, dressed, scheduling playtime, constructing activities, feeding her again, calming her down, having chill time, feeding her dinner, getting her bathed, and settled for bed.


    and this is where my problem is... i'm 21 years young... i dont have a child for a reason... because i dont want to dedicate my whole life to caring for an individual.  yes i do in the future. i want 5 kids but not now... i'm content with being 21 years young jay... i'm ok with this... i like it this way. and i feel trapped. i've been watching gabrielle for 3 years now, and at first it was a "pick her up from school 2 days outta the week and watch her", now it's like i'm picking her up every 5 days and watching her as late as 8/9 oclock at night. and school is about to start back again school and i DONT have the time to do this again... of course when i say to mary kay that i will only be able to watch her 2 days she always complies.  it's always -- yeah thats cool... dont worry about it... blah blah. and then i end up watching her 5 days... i end up picking her up from school when her FATHER is able to... i end up fucking being a nanny for them instead of a babysitter for a few days out of the week. i wanna tell them how i feel (i feel used -- like i'm their cinderella and whatnot) but i dont know how to say it... this is why they tell you do not mix friends with business... it's ugly.


    it's getting out of hand... it's been out of hand for the past 2 years.


    i dont wanna do this anymore. ugh


    if anyone has suggestions on how i might rectify this situation please hand them over...


     


    ps - i got new pics -- will post them soon!

Comments (3)

  • "my life is under new management," and i'm the boss :)
    stay positive and stay kind. john.

  • I think that you should just be honest with her. Tell her that you love her baby and you love her but school is going to have to take priority in your life. Tell her that you will be more than willing to help her but she has to understand that you have to take time out for yourself too and that school is important to you. Don't be mean but be honest, that's the only thing that you can really do.

  • hi, how are u?? I should better tell her your real feelings.! Be honest!:) but be ready for the consequences of your actions.:) :)

    God bless.:)

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