April 26, 2005

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  [ quote ] :: “if you ever had hook ups with the bootleg guy at school, you might have went to a ghetto high school!” – me or jaz

  
  

   

  
  

  [ xangsta ] :: EMMAgizer_Bunny

  
  

   

  
  

  [ new subs ] :: none

  
  

   

  
  

  [ this is jay every- tuesday ] :: the rules of a marriage

  
  

   

  
  

  I’m writing this because a lot of my friends are either married or getting married.  ::rolls eyes::  I’ve had a few arguments with one of my girlfriends about how a marriage should operate.  And I just want to layout on the table what I think a marriage should be like.

  
  

   

  
  

  
  
  1. I am still Jennifer Nichole Rash.  Just because your last name is behind my name doesn’t mean that I’m your property.  When I married you I became one half of “we”, but I am still “me.” Matter of fact, when I get married my name will be Jennifer Nichole Rash <insert new last name>.
  
  
  2. I don’t really need to worry about this, because we already discussed this.  You have to believe in a higher being.  Obviously you do, or I wouldn’t be married to you.  I’m not asking you to be a bible thumper, or a deacon or anything.  But I do except you to go to church and get something out of it.  That’s all.  And if you believe in what I do, odds are you do get something out of it.  I believe that God put you in my life for a reason, and I know you feel the same.  I hold truth in the saying, “a family that prays together, stays together.”
  
  
  3. This is 2005 (future years included lol), not 1955.  I do not wash your clothes, I do not was your dishes, and I do not cook your food.  If I can do my own shit, you can too.  I don’t mind doing some things for you if you do things for me too, but all in all, you got two hands do it yourself.
  
  
  4. I went to college for a reason.  So that I can have a job that pays me something.  I am a grown woman and I make my own money.  I don’t need you to take care of me.  I will have my own account.  You have your own account.  And we have an account together.  I work hard for my money, just as you work hard for yours and I believe we are entitled to our own money.  I don’t mind spotting you, or vice versa because that’s what we do.  We watch out for one another.  But I don’t expect you to support me.
  
  
  5. My family is a major part of my life, just as I expect your family to be very important to you too.  I value my family’s input, and I respect your family’s input too.  I don’t believe in not having anything to do with your family, or my family.  In my personal opinion, when you married me, you married the Rashs and the Brays.  And when I married you, I knew and wanted to marry the <insert name> and <insert mothers maiden name>.  I want to know that you have no problem being with my family, by yourself.  And if you can’t handle that, you’re history.  Matter of fact, every Sunday we go a visit our families.  I want to be close to your family, and when we have children, I want them to be close to their grandparents, etc.
  
  
  6. There is a little thing called “we” time, and a little thing called “me” time.  Without a good balance between the two, we will end up suffering.  Lets devote some nights to us (making dinner together, going to a movie, going out to eat, going out somewhere, renting a movie at home, etc.), so that we can have some quality time with one another.  On free nights, we can take the option of going out and seeing friends without each other.  Although it’s great to spend time with each other, I don’t want too much time together to ruin our perspectives.  We constantly need to be around other people, not just us.
  
  
  7. I want children.  I want lots of children.  You already know this because we talked about this before we got married.  We talked about when an appropriate time would be to start having children.  We decided that we would not bring a human life into this world, without knowing that everything is taken care of and all systems were go.  We want to be mentally, emotionally, and financially stable to take on probably the biggest joy, yet biggest challenge we may ever face together.
  
  
  8. When raising our children.  We have to come to an agreement.  We give our children every luxury, but we can take it away whenever we see fit.  When it comes to raising our kids, we are a team, not two players who take turns.  Just like I said before, I got your back and you have mine.  I don’t want my children to become accustomed to having one parent do everything; I want to set an example that mama and daddy love them equally, so mama and daddy share all responsibilities.
  
  
  9. You do anything that jeopardizes are marriage, it’s over.  I made a vow to you and God that I would never do anything to harm what God has put together.  When you fail to live up to your vows you have spit on me, God, and the sanctity of marriage.  I do not condone it and I will not lower my morals to stay in a marriage that condones that behavior.  Especially when children are involved.
  
  
  10. I love you.  I may be an independent woman, but deep down inside you are the rock that holds me together.  I depend on you to take care of me emotionally and mentally.  You aren’t just the man that I married.  You are my lover and my best friend.  You come first in my life, and I would anything for you.  I know how important it is to be myself and maintain my independency, because it strengthens the bond in our matrimony.

  
  

   

  
  

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  ron read that and said “jay, even jesus cant live up to those expectations!” lol weak

  
  

   

  
  

  so anyways i didnt update earlier cause p.lane spent the night and we stayed up til 6 in the morning... good times good times

  
  

   

  
  

  so tory's moving to suffolk... a good 30 minute drive and we drove down there last night and saw her parents double-wide.  that is a hot ass double-wide... 4 bedrooms and 3 bathroom... i was like DAMN!!!

  
  

   

  
  

  anyways... so the whole deal with justin... i dont know how stupid someone thinks i am... but i called virginia beach city jail... there isnt an inmate by the name of justin barricks... plus if he got pulled over here for a slew of things back in lynchburg... they would have taken him back there to do a case... until i get some substantial evidence that he is in virginia beach... i dont wanna talk to him cause i'm sick of the lies... really...

  
  

   

  
  

  anyways i'm talking to his guy... hmm his name is adrian and he works with my cousin.  he just got out of the marines and he's going to aviation school.  he's 23 and he's scottish.  hehe thats so awesome... but yeah we've been talking and texting each other the past 2 days... me likey a lot...

  
  

   

  
  

  anyways i'ma go... i gotta get the baby and stuff... and i'll end up chillin... i'll holla LOL much love xoxo

  
  

   

  
  

  
  

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  READ MY POETRY :: my_w0rds_are_like_water

  • 2:43 pm
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